The slap

Ok. Let’s talk about the slap.

Let’s forget about the fact that we are obsessing more over a minor incident between two grown men than the bombardment of little children in Ukraine. Let’s ignore the clearly weird psycho-sexual dynamics of the Smith family and very Lady Macbeth bearing of Jada. Let’s sidestep the ridiculous and racist hot takes about “black culture” as well as the equally ridiculous takes on this incident somehow being the result of white supremacy and let’s just focus on the one thing that really matters - Chris Rock.

Yes, Chris Rock. The vast majority of attention has been given to Will Smith. Why did he do it? What will happen to his career? Should he have been removed from the Oscars? Was his acceptance speech full of crocodile tears? Was this staged somehow to make him relevant again? Will he ever get another starring role in the movies? (Guarantee you that Tarantino is probably writing a script for him now). Blah. Blah. Blah.

At the end of the day Will Smith did what almost all of us do on a daily basis. He lost his sh-t. Am I defending him? Of course not. Should he have resorted to violence - absolutely no. Should he have had the manners to talk to Rock in private? 100%. But in the end he just lost his sh-t in a public forum. How many of us have done this? I bet a lot. I certainly have. I’ve had screaming matches with my ex on the sands of Ft. Lauderdale so loud that many beachgoers asked us to please, please, stop. I am not proud of it. I hope I have matured since then but I guarantee you that I could get you to act in the exact same manner if I find the right emotional button to push because we are all human.

What is far more interesting than Smith’s outburst at the Oscars is Rock’s reaction to it. The will of power to not strike back. The presence of mind to hold his tongue rather than throw a verbal jab after Smith yelled at him to “keep my wife’s name out your f-king mouth”. The grace of continuing to present the show live in front of millions of people worldwide. That was truly impressive.

A few weeks ago, @jposhaughnessy tweeted out "You can't affect the cards that you are dealt, but you can determine how you play them." I kept thinking about that statement over and over again after watching the endless replays of “the slap” on YouTube. Rock’s reaction is stoicism in a nutshell. Not blind acceptance, but rather a sober and controlled reaction to whatever comes your way.

They say that you really don’t know yourself until you start trading. And it’s true. Nothing will bare you raw like financial markets. Not sex. Not love. Not even the threat of violence. There is something about waging your financial and psychological resources on a game so full of seemingly predictable yet ultimately random outcomes that will rattle the calmest of souls and unhinge the most repressed personality.

The market bitch slaps us every day and most of the time we react very much like Will Smith. Lower lip quivering, bravado on full display, delusional in our confidence that we somehow “showed the world who is boss.” When in fact the true strength comes from the other side. From the ability to absorb the blow and gracefully move on. To refuse to engage in a race to the bottom and continue forward in a civil manner.

It is both ironic and instructive that this navel gazing self absorbed Hollywood moment is taking place against the truly horrid backdrop of tragedy unfolding in front of our eyes. What is Vladimir Putin but a lip quivering little boy who thinks he is showing the world “who is boss”? His end, like the end of all dictators will come eventually - but at what horrible cost to the rest of us? The next time that little dictator within us wants to rear its ugly head we should pause and think back on the lesson of grace under pressure that Chris Rock taught us all.